Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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