More tranny stories later!
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
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