Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
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