literally had 100 drinks last night.
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize