You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize