ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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