she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
