did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
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