I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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