party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
