I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
