is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
