Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
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I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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