There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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