your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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