I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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