But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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