I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
The beer is more important than you right now.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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