1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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