i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Randomize
