Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Randomize