Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
Randomize
