I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
