I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
I think my vagina is haunted
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
