He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Randomize
