how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
Randomize