He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
