what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
