she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
