It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
Randomize
