i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing