You're my little dorito
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
