I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
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