called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
