So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Randomize
