So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
