it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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