Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
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i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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