At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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