After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Randomize
