I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
