just tell him i said nine months
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Randomize