Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
