We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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