bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Randomize
