We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
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