he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Randomize
