My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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