dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
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