508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
