sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
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