this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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