he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
Randomize
